Last Post of 2010

Well. here we are again...another year has gone by and another is upon us. In some ways, 2010 felt like it flew by and in others, it felt like it would never end!! I am looking forward to 2011 for one. I always seem to be optimistic about a new year,thinking about the possibility of taking new chances, awaiting new opportunities and the wonder of new possibilities. I always feel like a new year is almost in a way, magical. I know that may seem silly but it is like the universe is giving us a brand new clean slate to work with. 2011 is like raw clay for us to mold and shape into our own personal experience. Whatever happened in 2010 won't seem to matter anymore because it will be 2011. 2011. Wow! When I was a kid, 2011 seemed sooo far away. I guess at the time, it was. lol

I guess I get a bit sentimental at this time of year. I look back on the fading year with fond, or maybe not so fond memories. I get nostalgic. I tend to think about my life more at this time of year and what I feel I have accomplished or haven't or would like to the following year. It is a time of reflection for me. The last couple of New Year's haven't been too glamourous , or exciting for me. As you may already know, my beloved mother passed away in June 2007. (3 weeks prior to her 83rd b-day) It was sudden and most unexpected and ever since then my holiday celebrations have been very low-key and quiet. It wasn't exactly planned that way. but rather it just seems to happen that way. This time of year, I know is difficult for a lot of people,myself included. It is the time I am reminded of my loss. I know life goes on. At times, it may seem like I don't realize that but I assure you I do. Life moves forward, but my pain has yet to. I was very close with my mom and I guess I took our relationship for granted because I never realized just how close I was with her or  just how much I loved her until she was gone. I  could dwell on this subject, but I won't. Tonight is supposed to be a night of celebration, so I say let's celebrate and be merry!! Dust off that vintage you had tucked away for a special occasion and pop that bad boy open!! Don't be shy!! I might have a drink or 2 myself when that ol' ball drops. Don't forget to grab your sweety  and plant one on them like you mean it, when that clock strikes 12. Have a ball!! Get crazy!! But be safe. Do not do anything stupid (well not dangerous stupid) like drink and drive. You want to make sure you live to see 2011. Since it getting late, I must dash. Besides I want me a kiss....it must be 12:00 somewhere already!! lol And remember if confetti doesn't fall out of your underwear, then you are NOT partying hard enough!! :)

Until next year...

Blogs & Kisses,

 Chanel

Newest Update to Chanel's website

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Merry XXXmas!!

Just wanted to wish everyone a very merry Christmas!! I I hope Santa was good to everyone, even if you were Naughty!! lol  I also hope everyone is having/had a wonderful fun day full of friends and family!!! My holiday has been a quiet one, but nice. Since I changed my mind on what new camera I wanted (the one I wanted was twice the price of the original one I wanted  and it was out of our budget) and I was taken out to dinner for my birthday, I decided to treat myself to a little something. I was very fortunate to receive a nice sum of money from a very generous cousin of mine. So I ended up buying myself that very nice camera I wanted. (kodak easyshare Z981) It takes phenomenal pictures and I can hardly wait to take my new set of pics with it!! It has 14 megapixels and 26 x optical zoom. It really is a powerful little cam!!!

Happy Holidays!!! Meet me under the mistletoe!! xoxo

Birthday pics...

Here are some pics taken tonight at my birthday dinner. :)

Happy Birthday to Chanel!!

Happy Birthday to Me!! Happy Birthday to Me!! Happy Birthday Dear Chanel!!! Happy Birthday to Meee!!! LOL Yes, I am another year older today...41. However, in many ways, I still feel 18. I wish I still looked it!! But with age comes wisdom, or so they say. I don't know exactly how wise I feel today. Truthfully, I would rather be back in bed. I did NOT want to get up today. It was so nice and warm in my bed but I felt guilty sleeping my special day away, so I got up. I need to drag myself to the shower and start getting ready for my night out. 


My boyfriend, for lack of a better term, (he is not my favorite person in the world right now) wants to take me out for my birthday. That is a very sweet gesture and I do appreciate it but part of me doesn't feel like going out for several reasons actually. My eye is very irritated and is driving me bonkers for one. Since our "falling out", I am not feeling very romantic or cozy/cuddly. I am still hurt and I am not the type of person who can just sweep things under the rug. I am doing my best to make the best out of a bad situation but sometimes that ain't enough. I  just don't know.Besides,it doesn't look like such a great day out either. It is cold out presumably since it is December. 


Also, I don't know if I can find what I want to wear. I do realize I have a closet crammed to the gills with clothes, but I don't have a lot of winter outfits suitable for a nice dinner out. I can wear a dressy sweater and nice pants but I am in a dress mood. Laying in bed last night , awake by the sound of LOUD , annoying snoring, (lol) I took the time to go through my closet in my head and decided on a turquoise velvet ruffle dress. It is a gorgeous dress and looks festive. It has short sleeves though, but I assume the restaurant will have the heat on and won't sit us near the door. The perfect shoes for such an occasion are my black and turquoise velvet slip-on heels. They are stunningly beautiful as shoes go!! I was so excited when I finally bought them. I just hope I can find everything in time for dinner. My clothes/shoes tend to wander away from the closet a lot of times. I should go look for them now but again I am just not feeling like moving. Can we say LAZY??!! It is MY birthday and I am entitled to BE anyway I feel, at least for the next 24 hrs.!! lol


We are going to Raffaele's, my favorite Italian restaurant where I hope to indulge (or overindulge) in amazing garlic dinner rolls with ranch dressing, (really good) salad, yummy Veal Parmesan (my fave dish) with a side of garlic butter pasta and to top it all off with either cannolli  or their sinfully good almond cake. (either way I am good) Well, I was just informed that I better start getting ready. God, he knows me sooo well!! lol Yes, I am a woman and I take an eternity to get ready but hey, I am worth the wait!! ;)

New Fan Art Page

Please make sure you check out a new feature on my blog, the Fan Art page. The page link is on the sidebar. If you are interested in contributing some artwork, please send me your pictures to : chanellamour@hotmail.com and I will happily post them and give you the credit you deserve. Thanks again to all of you that submitted art. Makes me feel warm and tingly all over!! ;) Please bear with me on the new page, as I am still learning how to post on it. lol

Sorry but the Dam Broke

I apologize for not updating my blog recently. I normally try to post at least every couple days. However, I had some personal problems that I was going through in my relationship and I didn't want to bum people out with my situation. I had my heart broken and I am in the process of trying to put the pieces back together again. (if that is at all possible) It has not been easy for me, especially with my birthday tomorrow and the upcoming holidays. This is supposed to be the season of LOVE and I have not been feeling very lovable lately. When your faith and trust are broken, it is most definitely difficult to make that leap of faith back to being a trusting person. Normally, I am a very trusting person but I HATE it when someone abuses that trust, especially those closest to you. It is a betrayal. Anyway, so that is what I have been dealing with lately and that is why I haven't had an update in a few days. I just didn't feel like writing or dealing with my feelings or emotional pain. I still have my holiday set in the works and hope to have the latest pics, posted on here as soon as they go live on my site. I am really behind this holiday season and honestly, feeling majorly overwhelmed. But be on the look out for some really cool sets over the next few weeks. I have so much I want to do and hope to have them completed soon. You will find out first here. See you soon, I promise. ;) Blogs & Kisses, Chanel

I CAN'T SLEEP!!!!!

This sucks...I cannot sleep. I have been tossing and turning for hours and NOTHING!! I got up because I have heard the longer you lay awake, the more awake you will become. I have read it is best to get up and tire yourself out. So here I am...UGH!!!


I drank a large glass of milk hoping it would relax me. I don't like it warm. I have been catching up on my Facebook games to kill time. Bed was so nice and warm and comfy. It will now be cold and empty as it is almost 7 am and my beau has left for work already. I HATE sleeping alone!! I really do. I love cuddling and snuggling!! (especially if you are warm natured) Well, I have been up for 3 1/2 hours (out of bed) so perhaps I should at least try to go to sleep again. Well,if I cannot sleep I will be back... pleasant dreams xoxo Chanel

Santa, I can explain...lol

I think for the most part I have been good this year. And I have a birthday that is slowly creeping up in 9 short days and for once, I wouldn't mind a combo (xmas/birthday) gift. I tried to think of something I wanted for Christmas this year.However, I am blessed by having a lot of things, lots of stuff and a nice place to keep it all . I love holidays and always have!! As long as I could remember, I always loved any type of celebrations. Any reason to celebrate or any milestone to mark ceremoniously  is good enough for me!! 


After my father passed away in 2004, holidays took a very different turn for my mother and me. They were very quiet and not fully "celebrated" like in years passed. It was not the same. I knew my mom lost her Christmas spirit after my dad died. I think she missed him until the day she died in 2007. I know I miss them both very much still and feel like part of me died with them. However, their memory never will. Anyway, before I get too morbidly maudlin, let me get back to my original subject of holidays,Christmas in particular.


I love gifts!! Giving them gives me such a thrill,but I admit I really love getting them too!! What can I say?? I love to be spoiled and pampered...something that sadly, hasn't happened in a real long time. 


Anyway, Like I was saying, after the passing of my dad, things changed in my family. Long gone were the days of hours spent Christmas morning unwrapping gifts and making a wrapping paper mess all around the Christmas tree. The big holiday meals were also too much of a bother now. I don't know if I had mentioned it or not, but  when I was 18, my immediate family moved away from NJ to NC, (where I have resided the past 23 years) leaving all my extended family behind. (half-brothers, sisters-in-law,nieces,nephews,aunts,cousins etc.) This changed our holiday celebrations from a crowded house of people down to 3 people and maybe a couple friends. I missed those large family gatherings and I guess I still do. Well, my mom was growing older and more forgetful, so holiday shopping was difficult for her. I remember having to show her what I wanted and then seeing whatever I picked out in the cart when we would go checkout. Don't get me wrong...I was grateful for whatever she bought me but it is nice to be surprised. So that pretty much ended my surprises!! Soon after that, mom and I just didn't bother with really celebrating Xmas and then she died.


My ex-boyfriend really didn't have a clue when it came to gifts. No wonder he needed his mother's help!! I am sorry but when you are in your mid to late 30's and you can't buy your girlfriend a nice gift, you have something wrong with you!!It isn't exactly rocket science!! lol 


His mother even bought me nicer gifts then he did. His mom got me an unusual gold necklace and pj's with snowflakes on them and for my birthday she got me a pink Winnie the Pooh hoodie that I absolutely loved!!! She was worried I wouldn't like it because she is the type of person that believes only children should like cartoon characters!! Her son was into comic books and that really grinded her gears!! She was always trying to get him to get rid of them or sell them and he had an entire room full!! 




Anyway, for my birthday and Christmas presents he gave me a box full of comics for one!! I didn't even like comics, but in fairness, he had some cool titles in there about rock stars that I liked. He also bought me an ear bud thingy for my cell phone which I think I only used once because I don't drive and talk on my phone normally. I also got a Barbie doll case, I guess because I collected Barbies at the time. (but I didn't play with them). A Mickey Mouse beach towel. (that one still puzzles me) and a Winnie the pooh poster. I know he tried with the poster but he knew I liked Pooh collectibles and wasn't keen on posters because I did not want to hang any on the wall.


 I don't know about him though because even on Valentine's Day, I got weird things....a Curious George dvd (I liked George when I was a kid) and not the big cartoon movie that came out a few years back...it was a 20 minute cartoon based on one of his books. He also bought me an African violet which at first I thought was weird until he explained and then I loved it. He said roses/cut flowers end up dying in a week or so and this way, I would have a pretty flower that would last. Pretty smart for a guy who acted like he never met me when it came to buying me presents. I believe he didn't even giftwrap my presents either and that is a pet-peeve of mine. Another one is last minute shoppers...people who wait until Dec. 24 to do their shopping!!! To me that says, I have to buy you a gift but you just aren't important enough for me to put any real thought into it. UGH!!!


And my current beau, has never bought me anything for my b-day or Christmas or any other holiday for that matter. Maybe I am spoiled or have been in the past but I miss wondering what someone got me for a present and tearing into a nicely wrapped package. I was hoping that my friend and I would exchange gifts this year,but I am doubtful. As I stated earlier, I do have LOTS of things and for the past few years, I haven't really asked for anything, other than the occasional DVD or book. And this year, there are a few things that not only do I want but that I actually do need. I won't go into them all because it would bore you...some are very trivial things like socks. lol 


But the one thing, I really want more than anything is a new digital camera. I informed Santa what it was that I wanted and even left the website open to the exact one I want too!! http://store.kodak.com/store/ekconsus/en_US/pd/C195_Digital_Camera/productID.201200600 (in purple) AND last night I was so tickled because I found an ad for Kodak and it stated it was having a big holiday sale on every item online. I was on their website just the day before because I received an email newsletter from them, giving me a special code for 30% off anything online. The camera I wanted was already marked down $10 but was still a bit more expensive than my local store. However, I noticed free shipping AND a 2 G memory card with purchase, as well as a free photo album. Not bad,eh? So I visited their site again and the camera is now marked down $20, which makes it .05 cheaper than my local store and I still have an additional 30% off too!! So all excited I planted the seed again today and still nothing, no reaction!!


I sincerely hope that Santa reads this and takes pity on me!! I WANT THAT CAMERA!!!
I have been good,Santa...really I have. Ok, I can hear the roar of laughter.      




Pllleeaaasssseeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pretty please with cherries on top and whipped cream and even sprinkles!! Ok, this is beneath even ME. I hate groveling!!! lol But I still really want that purple camera!! Oh,Lordy I sense men with big white coats and butterfly nets coming to pay me a visit and I don't think they are coming for tea and cucumber sandwiches either!! lol


If you are unfortunate enough to still be reading this, I thank you and wish you a very Happy Holidays!! Until next time...Blogs & Kisses, Chanel

Are you ashamed of your love for BIG girls???

The other day I was browsing through craigslist because I love a good bargain and I found something that really grinded my gears! In addition to searching for free stuff and bargains, I decided to see where the "adult" section was. I had heard of many webmodels advertising for free in there, so I decided to have a look. A while back, I noticed ads for escort services in there, so I knew there was something naughty on craigslist but just couldn't find it. So I decided to use the search feature and I typed "BBW" in the search box and next thing I know I am staring at a good page or 2 of personal ads. I admit I was curious. I live in a small suburban town, some sections a bit rural and have never found many men who are into bbw's around here. The nearest town listed on craigslist was 45 minutes away but a much larger town and is next to a military base so I figured tons of men, so the odds might be in my favor. It is where I met my ex-hubby too (he was a soldier) so I was hopeful I would find some FA's listed there.(fat admirers) I began reading the ads and at first I was surprised reading all the "No Strings Attached" ads, but as I continued to read, I felt myself getting upset, and then more and more so until I was angry!!


Do you know what I found??? I will tell you.....


There were a ton of "just for fun" type ads = one night stands/friends with benefits
However, these guys posting these ads were not true FA's....they were all just curious about BBW's and always wondered what it would be like to have sex with one. Sorry, guys but we are not all a ride at Disneyland!!!! I could not believe that not one man who wanted hot sex wanted it because of their true love for big women. It was either mostly out of curiosity or they were FA's ashamed of their preferences!! Now I realize there are still a bunch of guys hiding out in the FA closet but I could not believe how many were ashamed and how ashamed they were!!!


Moving on, I decided to read the ads that stated they were looking for friends or whatever happens to the ones actually looking for a relationship. Since these ads turned up when I searched  "bbw", I was eager to see what kind of men liked bbw's near me. In the past, I had used bbw dating sites and I had NEVER found a FA any closer than an hour and a half away..most were 3 hours away!! So this was a bit exciting to me to see guys a bit closer to home, that actually liked bigger women. So on I read....and what I read really got me going and not in a good way either. I kept on reading and one after the other, all said the same thing , "Sorry, No BBW's." WTF??!!! I couldn't believe what I was reading.




I know men have always made jokes about "no fat chicks" but my God, I never expected someone to put the equivalent on a personal ad!!! That was so insulting!! Imagine if I put in an ad "Sorry no small Dicks". Men would be outraged!!! Just because the term BBW is more mainstream nowadays does not mean it is ok to use it to insult us. One guy went as far to write, "I have been out with all types of women, short,tall, young ,old, redheads,blondes but please no BBW's. I know that sounds shallow but I am not into them." Yes, it does sound shallow and mean!! I wasn't even looking for a guy but this still angered me!!


What ever happened to not judging a book by it's cover, or beauty is in the eye of the beholder,or if you don't have anything nice to say, do not say anything at all??!! What about inner beauty?? Us bbw's are more than just bigger women, ya know? We have feelings, we have interests and are intelligent and sweet and caring...you get the picture. I guess it all boiled down to the bottom line that really got to me...we were good enough to be fucked, in secret that is BUT we are not good enough to date or be seen in public!!


If someone wrote they have no interest in old people or short people etc. I think that is unfair because you cannot always change the hand you are dealt. I am barely 5' 3" and I always wish I were taller but there really isn't much I can do about that aside from wearing high heels all the time. I also am almost 41 yrs. old. Do I wish that maybe I was still in my 30's?? Yes, but as far as I know there is no fountain of youth and if I want to stay young, I just have to take good care of myself and keep a young outlook, like I feel I already do. I think it is unfair to single out a group of people on a personal ad....like if I wrote " Sorry no Italians"  (or any other race/nationality), not only is it racist it is rude and just plain wrong. Btw, I would NEVER say anything like that!! Even if  someone wrote in an ad "People with big ears/noses etc. do not apply." I find that awful. 




To not like someone because of something that they cannot change, to me is wrong. Now, I know you are probably thinking people can lose weight and yes, that is true but just how easy is it?? It is a struggle and does not exactly happen overnight. People sometimes have to have surgery in order to lose weight, so it is not just something as easy as say changing your haircolor. I think people need to see the person underneath...underneath all the fat, or behind the big nose, or beyond the skincolor or boob size or whatever. And as my bf, so wisely pointed out, if one is so busy chasing one thing, they may miss out on something else, something totally unexpected and wonderful. And I couldn't agree more...if a guy is busy searching for this perfect blonde and passes up the chance to even know a brunette or readhead, he may miss out on the opportunity of a lifetime. That blonde or redhead may be the perfect person for them, more so then some random blonde that  is boring as hell but fits the bill because she has blonde hair. I guess I am saying to be open in your options ...don't limit yourself. I guess that is why I am bi-sexual!! lol


I understand it is not everyone's cup of tea to like big chicks and that is their prerogative but they don't need to be mean or advertise that fact to the world. It is ok to wear an "I Love Skinny Girls" t-shirt but the whole "No fat-chicks" thing..No,no,no!! Have a little class, for heaven's sake!! Maybe think about someone else's feelings before tearing them down. Maybe there is something I don't like in the opposite sex...hell, we all have likes and dislikes, turn-on's and turn-offs  but do I advertise what I don't like physically?? No, I really don't or try not to and I especially wouldn't write it out in an ad. I can see publishing the fact you do not like smokers or people who don't like animals etc. but leave the hatred for bbw's out of it, ok? Or else next thing you know there will be a sudden upheaval in women's personal ad's stating "Men with small penises need not apply." and we don't really need to go there do we???


Until next time....XOXO Chanel

Just A Reminder...

The 2010 Fatty Girl's Blog BOOTY contest is on!!! Yours truly wants to win!! I am currently moved up from 5th and am currently in 3rd place. I need to have twice as many votes to win or even come close to first place so now you see why I so much WANT YOUR VOTE!!! 
VOTE FOR ME, PLLLEEEEEAAASSSSSEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! (pouts and bats eyes)
It is so easy to do..go to http://www.fattygirlsblog.com ....on the  rt. hand side of the screen is the voting poll, just click to place your vote. I am booty#14!!  All the contestants booty pics are on the main page there, so make sure you check out yours truly's ass!! It is so round, so firm and fully packed!! So please vote for me a.s.a.p. as the contest will come to an end on Fri. Dec. 10. Get those votes in!! I appreciate all your help to all who voted for me!! Mwah! Mwah! Until Next time...

Please Vote for me....

I am entered into the 2010 Fatty Girls Blog's Booty Contest and need your votes!!! It is very simple to vote. Go to www.fattygirlsblogs.com and vote for me booty 14!!! Thanks for your support!! xoxo