The other day I was browsing through craigslist because I love a good bargain and I found something that really grinded my gears! In addition to searching for free stuff and bargains, I decided to see where the "adult" section was. I had heard of many webmodels advertising for free in there, so I decided to have a look. A while back, I noticed ads for escort services in there, so I knew there was something naughty on craigslist but just couldn't find it. So I decided to use the search feature and I typed "BBW" in the search box and next thing I know I am staring at a good page or 2 of personal ads. I admit I was curious. I live in a small suburban town, some sections a bit rural and have never found many men who are into bbw's around here. The nearest town listed on craigslist was 45 minutes away but a much larger town and is next to a military base so I figured tons of men, so the odds might be in my favor. It is where I met my ex-hubby too (he was a soldier) so I was hopeful I would find some FA's listed there.(fat admirers) I began reading the ads and at first I was surprised reading all the "No Strings Attached" ads, but as I continued to read, I felt myself getting upset, and then more and more so until I was angry!!
Do you know what I found??? I will tell you.....
There were a ton of "just for fun" type ads = one night stands/friends with benefits
However, these guys posting these ads were not true FA's....they were all just curious about BBW's and always wondered what it would be like to have sex with one. Sorry, guys but we are not all a ride at Disneyland!!!! I could not believe that not one man who wanted hot sex wanted it because of their true love for big women. It was either mostly out of curiosity or they were FA's ashamed of their preferences!! Now I realize there are still a bunch of guys hiding out in the FA closet but I could not believe how many were ashamed and how ashamed they were!!!
Moving on, I decided to read the ads that stated they were looking for friends or whatever happens to the ones actually looking for a relationship. Since these ads turned up when I searched "bbw", I was eager to see what kind of men liked bbw's near me. In the past, I had used bbw dating sites and I had NEVER found a FA any closer than an hour and a half away..most were 3 hours away!! So this was a bit exciting to me to see guys a bit closer to home, that actually liked bigger women. So on I read....and what I read really got me going and not in a good way either. I kept on reading and one after the other, all said the same thing , "Sorry, No BBW's." WTF??!!! I couldn't believe what I was reading.
I know men have always made jokes about "no fat chicks" but my God, I never expected someone to put the equivalent on a personal ad!!! That was so insulting!! Imagine if I put in an ad "Sorry no small Dicks". Men would be outraged!!! Just because the term BBW is more mainstream nowadays does not mean it is ok to use it to insult us. One guy went as far to write, "I have been out with all types of women, short,tall, young ,old, redheads,blondes but please no BBW's. I know that sounds shallow but I am not into them." Yes, it does sound shallow and mean!! I wasn't even looking for a guy but this still angered me!!
What ever happened to not judging a book by it's cover, or beauty is in the eye of the beholder,or if you don't have anything nice to say, do not say anything at all??!! What about inner beauty?? Us bbw's are more than just bigger women, ya know? We have feelings, we have interests and are intelligent and sweet and caring...you get the picture. I guess it all boiled down to the bottom line that really got to me...we were good enough to be fucked, in secret that is BUT we are not good enough to date or be seen in public!!
If someone wrote they have no interest in old people or short people etc. I think that is unfair because you cannot always change the hand you are dealt. I am barely 5' 3" and I always wish I were taller but there really isn't much I can do about that aside from wearing high heels all the time. I also am almost 41 yrs. old. Do I wish that maybe I was still in my 30's?? Yes, but as far as I know there is no fountain of youth and if I want to stay young, I just have to take good care of myself and keep a young outlook, like I feel I already do. I think it is unfair to single out a group of people on a personal ad....like if I wrote " Sorry no Italians" (or any other race/nationality), not only is it racist it is rude and just plain wrong. Btw, I would NEVER say anything like that!! Even if someone wrote in an ad "People with big ears/noses etc. do not apply." I find that awful.
To not like someone because of something that they cannot change, to me is wrong. Now, I know you are probably thinking people can lose weight and yes, that is true but just how easy is it?? It is a struggle and does not exactly happen overnight. People sometimes have to have surgery in order to lose weight, so it is not just something as easy as say changing your haircolor. I think people need to see the person underneath...underneath all the fat, or behind the big nose, or beyond the skincolor or boob size or whatever. And as my bf, so wisely pointed out, if one is so busy chasing one thing, they may miss out on something else, something totally unexpected and wonderful. And I couldn't agree more...if a guy is busy searching for this perfect blonde and passes up the chance to even know a brunette or readhead, he may miss out on the opportunity of a lifetime. That blonde or redhead may be the perfect person for them, more so then some random blonde that is boring as hell but fits the bill because she has blonde hair. I guess I am saying to be open in your options ...don't limit yourself. I guess that is why I am bi-sexual!! lol
I understand it is not everyone's cup of tea to like big chicks and that is their prerogative but they don't need to be mean or advertise that fact to the world. It is ok to wear an "I Love Skinny Girls" t-shirt but the whole "No fat-chicks" thing..No,no,no!! Have a little class, for heaven's sake!! Maybe think about someone else's feelings before tearing them down. Maybe there is something I don't like in the opposite sex...hell, we all have likes and dislikes, turn-on's and turn-offs but do I advertise what I don't like physically?? No, I really don't or try not to and I especially wouldn't write it out in an ad. I can see publishing the fact you do not like smokers or people who don't like animals etc. but leave the hatred for bbw's out of it, ok? Or else next thing you know there will be a sudden upheaval in women's personal ad's stating "Men with small penises need not apply." and we don't really need to go there do we???
Until next time....XOXO Chanel